Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Charlie Sheen

By Oliver Friedberg

In light of the recent social media frenzy surrounding Charlie Sheen, I decided to focus on him for this blog post. For some reason in class I said I was going to write a sonnet, and when I give my word, I keep it.

Charlie Sheen, God among Men

Supreme Gnar, gnarliest of gnarlingtons,

Show me your ways. How is it you are you?

Boom, crush, night losers: you’re hot as two Suns,

Soaring to great heights and loving the view.

King of kings, may you never cease to win.

Tiger blood in your veins, your fists breathe fire;

You’re a high priest Vatican assassin

Who nightly slays a Goddess’ desire.

Messiah of raging, rage on and again.

For breakfast this Monday, what will you choose:

Enough blow to kill two and a half men,

Seven gram rocks, or limitless booze?

Keep breaking records, beds, egos, and such,

Charlie, great warlock with the Midas touch.

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