In this technological age where nearly everything has “i” before it, it is not surprising that the age old battle of boys vs. girls has taken to the internet. Now the battle that I speak of is not necessarily he said, she said, but more a battle of quality. Yes ladies and gentleman, I am talking about fraternity and sorority email lists. Having been on a sorority list for about a year and having enough male friends forward me emails on a regular basis I feel like I am qualified to review and judge both.
Firstly, the sorority list. There are several “types” of email that get sent out. They can be classified into 3 main categories:
The Complaint Email aka The “OMGGGG” Email
If I had a dollar for every email that started “I’m not trying to be dramatic but..” I would be a very wealthy sorority girl. Email is a removed enough form of communication that girls feel comfortable sharing their feelings pretty bluntly, especially if someone has done something to irritate them. This can range from complaints about who ate the last of the spicy Doritos or who took whose yoga pants from the laundry room. The best part about these emails, though, is that no matter how scathing they may be they always end with a “Thanks girls!!” because it is, after all, a sorority email list.
The “Please can I borrow…” Email
This is the worst and most frequent type of email to be sent out to a sorority list. Because of the wide variety of events that sorority girls attend, and because of the even wider variety of dress up clothes that sorority girls acquire over the years, this email is a vicious perpetuating cycle. “DOES ANYONE HAVE A PURPLE ALLIGATOR ROMPER I CAN BORROW?? eom” is a realistic starting place when imagining this type of email. From feather boas to neon underwear, everything has been inquired after, and in most cases, loaned as well.
The “Come to my [insert strange activity or cause] meet/protest/gathering” Email
Because this is Stanford, another dimension has been added to the sorority email list that is not found on many other schools. The plea to be involved, somehow, in someone’s esoteric activity. Whether its signing a petition so that Stanford can buy a pet whale or being invited to watch dragon boat racing, the sorority email list is a great place to guilt-trip your sisters into supporting your weird extra-curriculars. It never hurts to put the subject line as “You guys all borrow my tops when we go out so its only fair that you….”
Fraternity lists, (like men?) are much simpler. They really only have one type of email and it is “The Funny story/clip/song/picture Email”. Yes, boys use the email list only for good, and to spread borderline inappropriate jokes. I recently got forwarded an email from a frat list for which the subject line was “guys I’m in line to buy 1000 chicken nuggets HAHHAH”. The email was sent at 1:30am and the best thing is that apparently at least three or four boys emailed back saying things equivalent to “wow that is so funny, best email ever.”
So is this a reflection of boys and girls, or just the way things work out in college? I love being on a sorority list, but sometimes I do wish that I woke up to a few less emails about purple nail polish and a few more about chicken nuggets.
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